Waw everyones so stress lately...we stay back almost everyday! For once im home this early... didnt have much to do anyways. I finally finished the stupid 50 line sketches for anatomy!!! YAY!!! Now 50 more... - - Haiz im suppose to be concentrating on my work.. yea yea i was told a thousand times... but i cant. It really sucks to know and to be told that everything was my fault... and it hurts when the people I actually care for are the ones telling me that... I thought i knew what my friends were thinking... thought i understood them... but well... finally found out that im really very different from everyone else. Somehow everything i did was wrong... i really did care... but somehow they took it as im making it worse for her. He said that im like that... even with him... that i'll get so affected that he would have to push away his problem to make me happy instead... i thought it was only him... thought that its just his way of thinking... but when everyone else told me the same thing i guess im the problem? Found it really unfair at first... that they would tell me this when i get affected by her problems but she got really upset too whenever im sad or troubled... i mean yea she cares cause shes a really really nice person... then cant i care for her too? I used to be able to tell them everything.. now im not sure... he would tell me im wasting his time if my problem wasnt that serious to him and i'll make her worry if im ever upset... then i'll get blamed... waw... and whenever i try to talk to anyone else about this i would have to go through a lecture... adults and their logic... i can just imagin myself telling whoever all this shit and i bet the person would go ''but you know im not like that~'' yea i used to know... but not anymore... now i dont dare to ''know'' anything. Lods of things happened in the pass few days... im glad some r somewhat solved but it still kinda shocked me. The reaction I got for opening my mouth... waw... i never expected it... I thought i understood her... or like ''know'' her well enough... thought i could talk to her... lol... stupid me... well my fault again. Haha. Trust is really important in a friendship or in any other relationship... I always ask why do people hide things from their friends or parents or whatever... Since young i was able to tell my everyone close to me everything. I didnt need to hide anything... now i got my answer... people dont dare to tell coz they r scared of the reaction they might get. Freaking cowards.. LOL. But well those people managed to avoid trouble... (if they r lucky) I still think that its best not to hide anything... but i have to... coz no one understands me... neither do i understand anyone anymore... i never have so many friends before... and its really nice... but now kimmy feels really lonely... coz theres no one that i can talk to... i will just smile^^ so i wont add on to everyones problems... then everyone will be happy too... no more worries =D we shall all get through this 3 weeks of hell together^^ then we'll go party! keke^^