Really dont understand why is it so hard for me to tell you how much i love you when i can just say it so easily to everyone else... why is it so hard for me to talk to you? i never really understood you... never knew what ur life was like... hack i dont even know whats ur job... and you probably never understood me... we can never communicate properly... and thats why i gave up going out or spending time with you coz we'll just end up in an arguement... sad really... i always knew you cared but you never knew how to express your feelings... i was unhappy coz u said u didnt love mummy anymore... coz u didnt do anything to save the marriage... you know... sometimes you just make me hate you so much... then after that you'll do something so nice and i'll feel so guilty... you could never control me... and i took advantage of that... i admit im the worst kind of child any parent can have yea... sorry bout that... but thanks... for accepting me... i really lost track of time tonight... thanks for waking up just to come pick me up... thanks for finding me... i love you papa... i just hope one day i can say this to you in person like i used to when i was just a kid... really wish i can go back to the time when i was able to write big i love you signs and stick them all around the house and you wont think im crazy....

Lol... you probably wont see this message anyway... but yea just really needed to tell you how much i love you.
Love you papa^^ alot alot....


Elaine.